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Hi! I'm Lacey!

I am a full-time working mom from North Alabama. I love my family, my friends, and my God!

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Wednesday, June 10, 2015

That moment...




I confess.. it happened yesterday... that moment when you think you are doing something good and are so proud of yourself and then someone comes along and makes you feel like poo.

Yesterday, I was so proud of myself.  This has been a super busy week but I really planned ahead and made some time to squeeze in a run.  It was easy to find an excuse not to go.  It was super hot and I was super busy.  But I pushed all those excuse aside and went to the gym, hopped on the treadmill, and set my 2 mile run/walk pace to follow my half marathon training plan for the day.

And then it happened.  She came.  That super skinny, super fit girl in her super cute workout gear stepped on the treadmill right beside me, cranked it up to high speed, and started effortlessly trotting along beside me. And all of a sudden, I heard that little voice discouraging me and putting me down. 

"Look how fast she is going."  
"Wouldn't you like to look like that?" 
"Don't you know, everyone is watching you both and can see how much better she is?"
"Your stomach rolls are jiggling."
"You're so not in good shape."
"Why don't you just go ahead and quit now before you get embarrassed?"

I found my eyes shifting to her pace and her distance and her seemingly effortless workout and found myself quickly filling with envy and embarrassment.  I all of a sudden went from feeling proud and accomplished to that dreaded feeling of not being good enough.  In my mind, she was making me look sub-par and I wanted to get off that stinking treadmill and just go home. 

But I didn't!  I quickly told that little voice to use "her" as motivation, not as discouragement.  I told myself that one day I will be running an effortless quick pace for a number of miles.  That we all have to start somewhere.  That my goals are about me and improving myself and not so I can be like someone else.  That one day my legs will not jiggle and my flab will not flop.  That I have a plan and am doing a great job of sticking to that plan.  That I am good enough!

It is so easy to get discouraged and want to give up when someone or something intimidating comes along.  Especially as women, we are constantly making observations and comparisons and putting ourselves down because we aren't "as good" as the other.  It is a horrible and terrible feeling that is so hard to overcome sometimes.  Even though it is tough, and something I really struggle with, I strive to do a better job of NOT comparing myself to others and instead, being proud of myself and all I have accomplished. I've worked hard to get here and I deserve to be proud of that!


   


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